Altruism makes you think
You’d a bit too much to drink.
Here’s its song (shed your tears,
Painful every note ya hears.)

“Take from a rich man,
Make him poor—
He’ll have virtue’s
Wealth in store.

“Give to a poor man,
Make him rich;
Call him, then, a
Son of a bitch!”

Altruism splits the town,
Turning justice upside-down.
We must damn it to its root,
Stomp it with a righteous boot.

Envy of ability,
Hatred of all pride—
Altruism’s history,
Don’t let it abide!