Oh, Jack, he felt him sick one day,
But shouted out a great “Hooray!
Doc Government I’ll go to see,
For my health care is fully free!”

Jack went to see Doc Government
And waited in a chair.
A week or two went swiftly by,
With Jack still waiting, waiting there.

But Jack was glad, he wasn’t mad,
For “Oh”, said he, “this isn’t bad,
To sit a chair so soft, comfee,
And getting all this time for free!”

One day the Doc came strolling out
And said, “Hey Jack, what’s this about?”
Glad Jack replied, “It is my head;
It is so sore I think it’s dead.”

Doc Government then spun around,
Did two big flips, stood upside-down,
Then said, with great authority,
“The perfect cure is plain to see.”

Doc Government then gave him pills,
Said, “This will fix all pains and ills.
Take one or two, or take them all,
But watch your step and do not fall.”

Then Jack took one, and Jack took three,
And praised his government, for free!
He tripped downstairs, and there he died,
And good Doc Government, he cried,

“Oh damn and damn, and damn again,
No revenue from dying men!
I did my job, I gave it pep,
And told the fool to watch his step!

“I went to school for one long week;
I dressed my hair so nice and sleek.
I let Jack wait, so he could see
The glory of health care for free.

“We’ll have to raise the taxes more,
Percentage up to ninety-four.
If they would have good health for free
They must pay out their liberty!”